A 14-Day Romance Challenge by Sharon Jaynes

Author:Sharon Jaynes
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780736969703
Publisher: Harvest House Publishers

DAY 10

Letting Him Know You Want Him!

You’re on Day 10! Congratulations! I’m so excited for you!

Now, let’s chat a little bit about a woman’s “wifely duty,” as I’ve heard it referred to more times than I can count.

A woman who fulfills her “wifely duty” out of obligation does not produce a sexually fulfilled husband. Nope, not at all. If you are having sex because you feel like you have to rather than making love because you want to, your husband can tell. Think of it this way. How would you feel if your husband came home from work on your anniversary, handed you a dozen roses, and said, “I didn’t really want to get you these roses. Seems like a waste of good money to me. But I read somewhere that I’m supposed to do something like this because it’s our anniversary. Here—hope you enjoy them.”

Would you enjoy such a presentation? I’d throw those babies right in the trash. And yet, that’s how many women approach the marriage bed. A man can tell when his wife is participating out of obligation and when she is enjoying loving her man. And even though he may feel some release after the song is sung, he will still feel a void in his heart of hearts.

Let me share one of the secret desires the survey respondents mentioned. Husbands dream of their wives initiating sex more often. Notice I said, more often. Some of you are trying to remember if you’ve ever initiated sex, so imagine the joy on his face when you try it the first time.

“But what will he think of me?” you wonder. “Will he think I’m a wanton, sex-crazed woman?” He might hope that’s what you are, but he won’t think that. He might be utterly confused at your sudden desire, but one message will come across loud and clear. “She wants me! She wants me!” You know what he’ll feel. He’ll feel like his dreams have come true.

Author and marriage expert Dennis Rainey tells a story about a young seminary student and his wife:

I will never forget an encounter with the young wife of a seminary student. She came up to me after I had spoken in a class for wives about how they could communicate love to their husbands, and she began to giggle.

“We were driving home the other night from youth group,” she said (her husband was a youth pastor). “I turned to him and I said, ‘Sweetheart, what would really encourage you to be a man of God?’

There was a moment of silence, and finally he said, ‘Well, it would really encourage me if I came home from class one afternoon and found you at home with no clothes on, welcoming me home.’”

The wife giggled again and asked Dennis, “Do you think he really meant it?”

I said, “I don’t know. Maybe you ought to try it!”1

Now, isn’t it interesting that this man who has immersed himself in the study of the Scriptures answered his wife this way? You would think he might want a set of theology books or some time with a great man of God.

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